Monday, February 22, 2016

How to Write a Literary Analysis Essay for Mac

Meredith and Kate
It’s super easy to write a literary analysis in this class. No really, suuuuper easy. There’s no format. At all. No rules, nothing. Just, yknow, react to the book. You can’t go wrong there is just a couple things to keep in mind. Like in prison, everything will be okay if you befriend a prison guard or get involved in one of those prison dog programs where you train dogs for the blind. Yeah that.  Ignore periods and commas those aren’t important anymore.
I felt like this belong. He is too proper to go unnoticed. 
If the book like reminded you of that one time your cat ate all the vacuum cleaner bags in your house and like your mom like yelled at you, write about that. Who cares. Let the inspiration run wild. You are a fluid spirit don’t let the system keep you down.

Feel free to write in choppy sentences. Like this. That’s a fragment. Or is it? I honestly wouldn’t know. But who cares. Grammar? Pssshhh. That so old school. Ignore the rules of grammar in your essay then will make it so much gooder.
Never write complex sentences. Seriously, keep things simple. Just launch right into whatever you wanted to say, no one will get confused. I promise. It won’t sound at all like a rant. Here, I’ll show you:
Scout’s classmates tell her that her “daddy defends niggers”. She asks Jem about it and he forwards her to Atticus. The racism is evident. He says, “‘Of course I do, don’t say nigger, Scout. That’s common’” (99). See dat? Courage is needed for Atticus to say this.
See? Not confusing at all, you know exactly what my point is with this whole thing and it works yafeel?
OH also, be sure to use lots of casual words he loves it. Seriously, it makes him feel like relatable and all and teen.
Some fun examples are:
  • u
  • yafeel
  • Icouldfuxwit (insert characters name) being all (insert characters emotion)
  • fosho
  • like (used as a conjunction)
  • literally (even when it’s not literal)
  • seriously (use this one a lot)
  • foreal
  • are you shittin me?
  • cmon
  • dat

Always talk about the reader. Seriously, every single time you mention something from the text, reflect on how this affects the reader. You are better than the author and everyone else. Don’t forget that.
Never hesitate to examine a character. Like this:
I really don’t agree with Huck’s decision to run away like what the heck? Who would do that. I would never run away from home I care so much about my family. And why does he have such a problem with his dad?  I once had a problem with my dad but I talked it out. Huck is clearly immature because he doesn’t talk it out. I think Huck’s also a bad person, I mean why won’t he stay in school? Who does that?
Basically treat literary analysis like a gossip session. Imagine the character is a person in your life and imagine you are talking to your friend about something they did. In fact, treat the character as a real person. Ignore the fact that the author created the character with a purpose because honestly that’s way too heavy for this class, let’s keep it simple people.

There is a couple steps you need to keep in mind when writing for Macattaq.
  1. Always google your analysis for quotes, he secretly writes for sparknote and gradesaver in his free time so he is basically giving you the answer. No he is giving you the answer.
  2. Come and talk to him about everything. But you must Start off the conversation with, “how many tic tacs have you eaten today, I think you have a problem.” Tbh we know they are pills he is fooling nobody
  3. If you don’t know something. Mumble.
  4. this guy likes to use big words but who the hell does he think he is use only words that you can find on his walls, those are the only words he believes in.
  5. in fact, construct entire sentences out of them, like this “ambiguity is the antithesis of complexity”

Both of these people have the same name. One is superior. But, look at both of their smug grins. Taunting you thinking they are big meech. Well they aren’t.

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